the smile – new york

What is it with New York restaurants serving warm tap water?

 

I am seriously asking this question. I realize that New Yorkers brag about their tap water being great tasting, clean water because it comes from some reservoir upstate, but that seems more like water marketing than actual truth.

 

Do restaurant people think we will upgrade to bottled water if we want something cold? That makes no sense to me. That would be like serving a basket of stale bread and saying, we have better bread if you would like to pay $2 for it or you can just eat this.

 

I completely blame this whole tap water situation for why I totally fell off the wagon at

The Smile (26 Bond St, New York).

 

I had been eating really clean and drinking nothing but water for almost a week so that I would look anorexic for fashion week. Sure, I had a couple slip ups and accidentally had

Spanikopita at Stella’s and two beers at Mekong, but other than that I was practically Ghandi. Leave it to me to be so good and then mess everything up at the last minute.

 

Drunk on warm Yankee water I couldn’t think rationally. I pointed my finger to the menu, felt my lips move and heard sounds come out as if I was having an out of body experience. “I’ll have the Moroccan Lamb Meatballs and a Hibiscus Margarita” said the voice that could only have belonged to some sort of Moroccan/Mexican meat craving demon that was living in the un-chilled water and temporarily possessed my body.

 

That is the only logical explanation for my actions because I don’t remember being that hungry. That is not to say that if I did have complete control over my decision making abilities, the words “simmered in a spicy tomato sauce” wouldn’t have a one upped “vinegar and celery seed dressing”. You guys know how I feel about celery.

 

I ate those meatballs and drank that margarita mostly out of fear of what could happen to my family if I tried to battle the evil spirits right there at the dinner table. 

 

Thankfully, my family made it through the meal unharmed, I survived without need for an exorcism and the meatballs were freaking delicious.